I’m Checking Out

To save myself. An essay about the hopelessness of America’s race relations.

I’m Checking Out

i gave you the signs

but you missed them

i told you how we feel

but you never listen.

too late

so slow

eyes closed.

our cares are different

so are our concerns

you my dear

only recall what is beneficial

for your pocketbook,

your house, your people

yourselves

what is favorable in your eyes.

your best interest

are not our best interests

so i’m settling my bill

canceling my debts

vacating my mind

i’m done searching my soul

i’m taking my heart.

i am checking out

of your world

to save myself.

This essay is about the hopeless feeling Blacks have about race relations in America from time to time. The inequality, long, never-ending imbalance of power, the unfairness, the biases, microaggressions, and anti-Black sentiments are overwhelming sometimes. Sometimes, you need to check out to save yourselves. Some fights aren’t really ours to finish.

One day, one day, we won’t have to fight.

Donnie Hathaway- Someday, We’ll All Be Free

©2019 Marley K. All rights reserved.